Ah yes, the world’s most reliable countdown clock:

Iran will have nuclear weapons in 2 weeks.

— 1995: “2 weeks.”

— 2005: “Still 2 weeks.”

— 2015: “Okay but this time 2 weeks.”

— 2025: “Breaking: 2 weeks again, now with better graphics.”

Meanwhile, 30 years later… Iran must have the most ambitious “coming soon” project in human history.

Now we’ve upgraded the script:

“The war with Iran will end in 2 weeks.”

Perfect. Same writers, new season.

At this rate:

The nuclear weapon arrives in 2 weeksThe war ends in 2 weeksPeace talks start in 2 weeksAnd somehow… it’s always 2 weeks away from being 2 weeks away

Honestly, “2 weeks” isn’t a timeline anymore — it’s a lifestyle.

Historians in 2050:

“Sources confirm everything was just about to happen… in approximately two weeks.”

Stay tuned for next week’s episode:

“Definitely this time. Seriously. We mean it. Two weeks.”